One of the most difficult things about starting a blog is giving it a name. I decided on "Longwinded Shortcomings" because I learned a long time ago that if you say something that sounds deep, you can figure out why it's deep later on. I'll let you know what I come up with.
It wasn't an easy decision, though. I actually hovered over the "Enter" button with the title of "Jerm's Bliggidy Blog, Dog" for an embarrassingly long time.
I know.
Some other discarded blog titles were:
What's Up, Blog?
Bloggy Went 'A Courtin'
I Like Big Blogs and I Cannot Lie
Snoop Doggy Blogg
The Hunger Games (just to get more hits)
Take This Blog and Shove It
Which brings up an interesting question: How important is a name? More specifically, how much of our identity is tied up in a name?
Let me explain.
I am a lot of things, all of which seem to be in a constant battle with one another to dominate my time, energies, and even my identity. Some of these things include:
1. I am a human being.
2. I am a man.
3. I am a son.
4. I am a brother.
5. I am an uncle.
6. I am a husband.
7. I am a father.
8. I am a minister.
9. I am a blogger (most recently).
10. I am a list-maker (even more recently).
Which of these things, though, is really "me"? Which one of them defines me? To be honest, being defined by any one of them can be a bit depressing at times. You might ask, "Why?" (It's ok to ask questions) Well, because - quite frankly - I stink at most of those things (except maybe the last one...that's actually a pretty good list).
For example, I'm not real sure that I'm a real "man". Before you schedule a Dr. appointment for me, let me clarify: I'm sure that I'm a MALE, but I'm not sure I'm a "real man". There are lots of manly things that I either can't do or don't care about doing. Hunting, fishing, building stuff, growing thick beards, having tools (the ones that were given to me at my wedding shower don't count because I still don't know what to do with them), etc.
I'm really still not sure what to say when I take my car to Wal-Mart for an oil change. I feel like I'm going to a drug deal (or my approximation of one...I've never been). Some shady-looking guy (or-more recently-some shady-looking woman) comes out and motions me forward and asks me to roll down my window. The conversation usually goes like this:
Shady woman: "What can I do for you?"
Me: "Um...I need an oil change."
SW: "Ok, what kind of oil?"
Me: [nodding, as if I understand the question, but still processing] ".........excuse me?"
SW: "What kind of oil do you want?"
Me: "This is my first time. What kind do you have?"
SW: "Well, there are lots of different brands, then you pick either 10W30, 10W40, 10W50..."
Me: "Yeah. That sounds good. I'll take that one."
SW: "Which one."
Me: "The WD40."
SW: "What?"
Me: "I'm sorry, I can't do this. Goodbye."
Then I peel out (in reverse) and drive away in shame. My oil has never been changed.
My point is, I often feel like a failure at almost everything on that list. I'm doing my best to be a good human being, a good son, a good husband, a good father, a good minister, etc......but I fail ALL THE TIME!! Can you relate? If my identity is wrapped up in any of those things, I'm in big, big trouble.
If only there was some way I could just start over at something. Something that wouldn't hold any of my mistakes against me. Something that gave me a clean slate and gave me a way to KEEP it clean. I could embrace that identity because I wouldn't feel like such a failure all the time. I could make that my TRUE identity, which would help me be a better man, father, husband, minister, etc.
I would almost have to be reborn, though, and we all know that's a bit unrealistic.
Hey, wait a second...
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