One of the most difficult things about starting a blog is giving it a name. I decided on "Longwinded Shortcomings" because I learned a long time ago that if you say something that sounds deep, you can figure out why it's deep later on. I'll let you know what I come up with.
It wasn't an easy decision, though. I actually hovered over the "Enter" button with the title of "Jerm's Bliggidy Blog, Dog" for an embarrassingly long time.
I know.
Some other discarded blog titles were:
What's Up, Blog?
Bloggy Went 'A Courtin'
I Like Big Blogs and I Cannot Lie
Snoop Doggy Blogg
The Hunger Games (just to get more hits)
Take This Blog and Shove It
Which brings up an interesting question: How important is a name? More specifically, how much of our identity is tied up in a name?
Let me explain.
I am a lot of things, all of which seem to be in a constant battle with one another to dominate my time, energies, and even my identity. Some of these things include:
1. I am a human being.
2. I am a man.
3. I am a son.
4. I am a brother.
5. I am an uncle.
6. I am a husband.
7. I am a father.
8. I am a minister.
9. I am a blogger (most recently).
10. I am a list-maker (even more recently).
Which of these things, though, is really "me"? Which one of them defines me? To be honest, being defined by any one of them can be a bit depressing at times. You might ask, "Why?" (It's ok to ask questions) Well, because - quite frankly - I stink at most of those things (except maybe the last one...that's actually a pretty good list).
For example, I'm not real sure that I'm a real "man". Before you schedule a Dr. appointment for me, let me clarify: I'm sure that I'm a MALE, but I'm not sure I'm a "real man". There are lots of manly things that I either can't do or don't care about doing. Hunting, fishing, building stuff, growing thick beards, having tools (the ones that were given to me at my wedding shower don't count because I still don't know what to do with them), etc.
I'm really still not sure what to say when I take my car to Wal-Mart for an oil change. I feel like I'm going to a drug deal (or my approximation of one...I've never been). Some shady-looking guy (or-more recently-some shady-looking woman) comes out and motions me forward and asks me to roll down my window. The conversation usually goes like this:
Shady woman: "What can I do for you?"
Me: "Um...I need an oil change."
SW: "Ok, what kind of oil?"
Me: [nodding, as if I understand the question, but still processing] ".........excuse me?"
SW: "What kind of oil do you want?"
Me: "This is my first time. What kind do you have?"
SW: "Well, there are lots of different brands, then you pick either 10W30, 10W40, 10W50..."
Me: "Yeah. That sounds good. I'll take that one."
SW: "Which one."
Me: "The WD40."
SW: "What?"
Me: "I'm sorry, I can't do this. Goodbye."
Then I peel out (in reverse) and drive away in shame. My oil has never been changed.
My point is, I often feel like a failure at almost everything on that list. I'm doing my best to be a good human being, a good son, a good husband, a good father, a good minister, etc......but I fail ALL THE TIME!! Can you relate? If my identity is wrapped up in any of those things, I'm in big, big trouble.
If only there was some way I could just start over at something. Something that wouldn't hold any of my mistakes against me. Something that gave me a clean slate and gave me a way to KEEP it clean. I could embrace that identity because I wouldn't feel like such a failure all the time. I could make that my TRUE identity, which would help me be a better man, father, husband, minister, etc.
I would almost have to be reborn, though, and we all know that's a bit unrealistic.
Hey, wait a second...
Thursday, April 12, 2012
Wednesday, April 11, 2012
I Have Nothing to Say About Modesty...
The subject of modesty is certainly a touchy one with some people. And by "touchy", I mean "they will scratch your eyes out if you don't shut up about it".
I, like most people, also have opinions on this issue. It is not my goal to state those opinions in this blog, though. No, I think I would rather present a biblical viewpoint.
However, there are so many different translations/paraphrases of the Bible that I decided I would be fair and try to present as many as possible, so that I don't misquote God's Word.
So here goes:
[By the way, if you don't know/love/appreciate/understand my sense of humor, please stop reading right here. Thanks. Just looking out for ya. Don't say I didn't warn you.]
I Timothy 2:9-10 says...
English Standard Version - "likewise also that women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self control, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly attire, but with what is proper for women who profess godliness - with good works."
King James Version - "In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array;
1Ti 2:10 But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works."
New Century Version - "Also, women should wear proper clothes that show respect and self-control, not using braided hair or gold or pearls or expensive clothes. Instead, they should do good deeds, which is right for women who say they worship God."
New International Version - "I also want women to dress modestly, with decency and propriety, not with braided hair or gold or pearls or expensive clothes, but with good deeds, appropriate for women who profess to worship God."
The Message - "And I want women to get in there with the men in humility before God, not primping before a mirror or chasing the latest fashions but doing something beautiful for God and becoming beautiful doing it."
New Exemption Version - "likewise also that women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self control, unless they're at the beach with their friends and a bunch of other nearly-naked people, in which case, please feel free to prance around wearing almost nothing. This verse doesn't apply to those situations. In fact, this verse really doesn't apply to you at all. You are exempt. Why? Because you are special. Because your parents will let you do these things, which makes these things right. After all, your permissive parents are going to trump God on Judgment Day anyway (see 2 Exceptions 3:43). Because God's Word doesn't apply to people who have worked out really hard and given up Twinkies for 6 months and want to show off their hotness to others. Because you should be able to have as much fun as you want to have without some old-fashioned, bikini-hatin', fun-destroying, life-ruining Christian meddling in your business. Proceed to party."
Facebook Standard Version - "And since the men have such a problem looking at your bodies anyway, how 'bout helping them out a little bit and stop posting pictures of yourself in what amounts to nothing more than colored underwear. Do something productive with your facebook account...and with your camera."
New American Fathers' Version - "And how in the world can you let your little girl run around with less clothes on than it would take to blow your nose with [which you should be quieter about, by the way; everyone in the building looks at you when you do that; it is a scientifically-proven fact that more nose hair=more volume]? Don't you care that other guys (even older, grown MEN) are looking at her in ways that only her future husband should? Believe me, Dad, you're going to have to make the final decision on this one because you are the only one who really understands this. Man up and do the right thing. By the way, Dad, if you want to avoid this altogether, take them to the mountains. When they hit that freezing Colorado air, they'll bundle up."
Brass Tacks Version - "Put some clothes on! [deep sigh]"
Maybe this will clear things up a little bit.
I, like most people, also have opinions on this issue. It is not my goal to state those opinions in this blog, though. No, I think I would rather present a biblical viewpoint.
However, there are so many different translations/paraphrases of the Bible that I decided I would be fair and try to present as many as possible, so that I don't misquote God's Word.
So here goes:
[By the way, if you don't know/love/appreciate/understand my sense of humor, please stop reading right here. Thanks. Just looking out for ya. Don't say I didn't warn you.]
I Timothy 2:9-10 says...
English Standard Version - "likewise also that women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self control, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly attire, but with what is proper for women who profess godliness - with good works."
King James Version - "In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array;
1Ti 2:10 But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works."
New Century Version - "Also, women should wear proper clothes that show respect and self-control, not using braided hair or gold or pearls or expensive clothes. Instead, they should do good deeds, which is right for women who say they worship God."
New International Version - "I also want women to dress modestly, with decency and propriety, not with braided hair or gold or pearls or expensive clothes, but with good deeds, appropriate for women who profess to worship God."
The Message - "And I want women to get in there with the men in humility before God, not primping before a mirror or chasing the latest fashions but doing something beautiful for God and becoming beautiful doing it."
New Exemption Version - "likewise also that women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self control, unless they're at the beach with their friends and a bunch of other nearly-naked people, in which case, please feel free to prance around wearing almost nothing. This verse doesn't apply to those situations. In fact, this verse really doesn't apply to you at all. You are exempt. Why? Because you are special. Because your parents will let you do these things, which makes these things right. After all, your permissive parents are going to trump God on Judgment Day anyway (see 2 Exceptions 3:43). Because God's Word doesn't apply to people who have worked out really hard and given up Twinkies for 6 months and want to show off their hotness to others. Because you should be able to have as much fun as you want to have without some old-fashioned, bikini-hatin', fun-destroying, life-ruining Christian meddling in your business. Proceed to party."
Facebook Standard Version - "And since the men have such a problem looking at your bodies anyway, how 'bout helping them out a little bit and stop posting pictures of yourself in what amounts to nothing more than colored underwear. Do something productive with your facebook account...and with your camera."
New American Fathers' Version - "And how in the world can you let your little girl run around with less clothes on than it would take to blow your nose with [which you should be quieter about, by the way; everyone in the building looks at you when you do that; it is a scientifically-proven fact that more nose hair=more volume]? Don't you care that other guys (even older, grown MEN) are looking at her in ways that only her future husband should? Believe me, Dad, you're going to have to make the final decision on this one because you are the only one who really understands this. Man up and do the right thing. By the way, Dad, if you want to avoid this altogether, take them to the mountains. When they hit that freezing Colorado air, they'll bundle up."
Brass Tacks Version - "Put some clothes on! [deep sigh]"
Maybe this will clear things up a little bit.
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
I give up.
I'll do a blog.
I can't promise that it will be anything that anyone will want to read, but I will do my best.
Actually, my mind is constantly racing with various thoughts, and a blog would be a pretty great outlet for them. I have resisted having a blog for some time now because...well, I just have. It's none of your business why. Stop asking. I may blog about it some day.
I can make a few promises as we begin this adventure together (whoever might be reading this right now....probably just my wife....I love you):
1. I will try to update this blog as often as possible
2. I will fail at #1...miserably
3. I will probably offend you at some point in the blogging process with something that I say. This will not be intentional. If you let me know when you are offended, THAT is the point at which it will become intentional. Just keeping it real.
4. This blog will be unpredictable. I have no intention of writing deep, theological posts every single day. If you are interested in that kind of blog, see DailyDeepTheologicalPosts@blogspot.com (don't, actually, because I just made up that website).
5. If you are interested in a daily update of what is happening in my family, my wife's blog is much better. The website is http://www.thepatepotpourri.blogspot.com/ (that one is real).
6. I just realized that #5 isn't actually a promise. I promise I won't do that again.
Enjoy!
I'll do a blog.
I can't promise that it will be anything that anyone will want to read, but I will do my best.
Actually, my mind is constantly racing with various thoughts, and a blog would be a pretty great outlet for them. I have resisted having a blog for some time now because...well, I just have. It's none of your business why. Stop asking. I may blog about it some day.
I can make a few promises as we begin this adventure together (whoever might be reading this right now....probably just my wife....I love you):
1. I will try to update this blog as often as possible
2. I will fail at #1...miserably
3. I will probably offend you at some point in the blogging process with something that I say. This will not be intentional. If you let me know when you are offended, THAT is the point at which it will become intentional. Just keeping it real.
4. This blog will be unpredictable. I have no intention of writing deep, theological posts every single day. If you are interested in that kind of blog, see DailyDeepTheologicalPosts@blogspot.com (don't, actually, because I just made up that website).
5. If you are interested in a daily update of what is happening in my family, my wife's blog is much better. The website is http://www.thepatepotpourri.blogspot.com/ (that one is real).
6. I just realized that #5 isn't actually a promise. I promise I won't do that again.
Enjoy!
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